Our fears

We all have fears... different kinds of them, from the fear of dark to the fear of being in the center of attention when all eyes are on you, from the fear of spiders to the fear of the own shadow, from the fear of pain to the fear of love, from the fear of closed small spaces to the fear of abyss, from the fear of losing loved person to the fear of sexual abuse, from the fear of people to the fear of being alone, from the fear of failure to the fear of insanity and so on...
We cling to our fears, because they become the part of who we are....
but where all these fears come from? Surely they originate from our childhood, due to parents' insensitivity or to some events happened in the childhood or even in the adulthood, or it depends on peculiarities of a child's character... Anyway gained while being a child we take this fear with us  and hold it for the whole life, without having a courage to confront it, to get rid of it, instead we let it deepen its roots, take control of us, and then it is we who follow its rules, and this make us easily controlled by other people, or vice versa if the person is totally free, it is difficult to manipulate him/her....   

I think everybody knows that the best and maybe only way to deal with any fear is to confront it. When you face your fears, they become weaker, because you realize that reality isn't as bad as you may think it is. For that reason, it is essential to expose yourself to the things you fear, to confront it again and again and again, until it disappears.

"Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked." - Steve Jobs

They say that at the end all the fears come from the primal fear of death through unknown, that our main fear is to die, which is strange because we all know that we will all die, the only thing we don't know is when we will die... We are so obsessed with fear of death that we sometimes forget to live, instead maybe the key for having no fears is to accept the death as it is and to begin to appreciate every day of our life, to live every day as the last one, to begin to enjoy life, enjoy every breath we take, to feel happy not because something happened, but just because we are alive,  because our hearts are beating... Really, sometimes i see people so angry and even furious for such unimportant things.... They are afraid to die, but they are not afraid of wasting the precious time they have for little insignificant things... I mean of course it is normal to be angry from time to time, it is human, it is healthy to feel strong emotions, but surely some people should be able to prioritize what is really important in their life and what is not, what to be really angry for and how to react on unexpected things, because life is an unexpected thing, life would have been so boring if it had been predictable... we want control and predictability, and when we don't have this, we begin to feel insecure and to have fear, which cause anger or apathy, but there is no way we can predict what will happen next, it is impossible, so we should give up the illusion of control, and only then we will be free. All the limits we have are set by ourselves, says the advertisement of red-bull, and it is true, just believe in yourself, it is time to get rid of your fears, to let them go...